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Badilisha Lugha KISWAHILI

Home...first school for children

21st September 2011
Parents should act as role models for their children

Many a time you find parents complaining about having to take care of this and that, paying school fees…the list is endless. Well, have we paused to think about those people who failed to mother or father a child? Have we ever imagined how they would feel upon listening to such complaints from us?

Children are a blessing from God and we should consider ourselves lucky and blessed to have such gifts. We should stop complaining about silly things and instead focus on sharing the best times with our children.

On Sunday when I went to church with my family I was touched by the priest’s sermon. He focused on the role of parents in a family. He emphasized the fact that parents should act as role models for their children.

I thought about his words of wisdom and looked at some of the things that we do as parents which often impact negatively on the children. I remembered one lady I once worked with who always said she doesn’t respect the marriage institution and she doesn’t want to get married herself.

Upon asking her why she told me that her late father used to fight with her mom almost everyday so all she remembers about him is the fighting bit and when he died it sought of brought relief on the nasty fights which bothered the children.

She further went to explain that three of her high school friends had since divorced and the two who remained in marriage were in the process of getting divorced. She herself had experienced a relationship and went into an engagement which broke in so nasty a manner that she didn’t even want to talk about it.

The bit I am interested in talking about is the bit where she talks about her parents. The example of marriage that she saw in her own parents was not a good one and for that reason she perceives marriage as an institution that brings about suffering and we cannot blame her for that. Definitely we blame the parents for fighting in from of their children thereby affecting their future lives.

The next time you want to behave badly in front of your children just think about how your behaviour will impact on your children now and in future. Also think about how lucky you are to have those children in the first place.

I am sure you all know the things that people do to get children. Some go to the extent of adopting just to have someone to call their child. Others go from hospital to hospital and even go to the extent of visiting traditional healers in the name of looking for children.

I am sure we have all seen or heard of people arrested trying to steal a child just because they are barren but so desperate to have a child which they can call their own. All these signs should act as a wake up call to us to value the children that we are blessed to have mothered or fathered.

We ought to cherish them and make better people out of them. We can only do that by behaving in such a manner that will act as a good model to the children.

Remember the home is the first school that a child attends and for this reason we ought to make it a good school for our children. Whatever they might learn outside school will only come secondary the most important things are the things they learn at home. Charity begins at home, so said observers.

You still want to complain about your children? I don’t think so. Let’s love our children and make them better children by reaching out to them and spending quality time with them.

We ought to show tender love and care to them so that they can open up to us and feel safe to confide in us because if we are closed up they will end up confiding in strangers thereby getting advice which might not be the best advice for them.

We don’t like that to happen to our children. I know we all want to share best moments with them. Do silly little things with them like play games read books or watching suitable movies together.

Tell you what we exercise as a family and we do play soccer at the beach together. Imagine I am the only female in my home which consists of three males in the name of my husband and two sons and myself so I have learnt to play soccer with them and we really enjoy it. I think I am fast becoming a man in everything that I do because of living in this man’s world but believe me there are also some feminine trends that they are adopting.

Believe they are all good cooks now since they have to sometimes help the only female in the house with the cooking and they enjoy trying out recipes.

So find your own ways of making your home a better place for your children because they spend more time at home and also it is home that influences what happens later in children’s lives. This week lets focus on making our homes better places for our children. Happy parenting.

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