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Are men becoming weaker than women?
2005-09-21 07:39:34
By Deogratius Mushi
Should we say there is something wrong with the statement that women are weaker than men, or rather, men are stronger than women?
For many years, men have ruled the earth. But when it comes to who is the stronger of the two, we shouldn’t underrate women.
Who says men don’t cry? Of course they don’t cry in public! At least only a few of them do or rather, they rarely do.
Ask me and I will tell you how men cry in secret when annoyed at their places of work, or when insulted by their lovers.
As campaigns rage throughout the country, there are some men supporting a particular candidate who will shed tears, come October when the person is not elected after the general elections.
Newspapers have shown us all funny stories happening during the campaigns, including candidates who kneel, begging for votes.
This is because their families might lose in one way or another since ’their’ candidate could have been the source of income for their family.
In normal circumstances, a man heartbroken by some misfortune might shed a bucketful of tears.
Such sad times could come as a result of things like losing a soccer match, a loss of a big amount of money in business, or falling out with one’s lover.
No one cares about big men chasing a ball around a pitch and kicking themselves more often than they kick the ball.
What if your sweetheart goes on holiday? Most men feel threatened and unsafe when women suggest anything to do with ’talking’.
Something that goes: ’Honey, we need to talk...’ is not music to their ears.
I asked a friend (Rose) whether she has ever felt there’s a communication gap between her and her husband Joe, and she told me, ’So many.’
There are times, for instance, when one has a burning issue that he or she wants to talk over with the partner, but whenever one suggests that they should try to settle the problem, the other tactfully avoids doing so.
Rose once told me that most men could be ignorant in this way.
That at times they give lame excuses whenever they are reminded to ’talk’.
She says one day she woke up her boyfriend at around 4a.m. and talked about the problem they had been facing for a long time. ’We reached a consensus that day,’ she says.
She says the best thing her boyfriend did was to avoid telling her that he had a terrible headache.
Most men affirm that most of women’s talk is always in men’s disfavour.
But why should one fear talking to his woman if there is nothing wrong going on? It’s either that most men are cowards or ’sinners’.
If you have a healthy and enjoyable relationship with your woman, then why do you become afraid when she tells you that you need to talk?
I think you would surely expect good news like ’Darling, I’m expecting a son?’Let’s get to the bigger myth: Men are courageous while women fall apart like overcooked pumpkins.
This is the worst of them all. Look at a man approaching this young woman and watching her legs.
His heart is already working overtime, his breath is fast and inside he is just a jelly of flesh.
He swallows twice, smacks his lips and begins ’err... could I ...er...I ...er talk to you.’
All men find women alarming in one way or the other, and their fears can be as powerful as their lust.
John Assenga, a university student once told me that he would rather get stuck in a lift with a rabid dog than with an angry feminist.
Men need to feel they have control over their lives, are liked and can say or do exactly as they please.
A look, or a thorough ’away remark’ or a shrug of the shoulder can have effect on the male ego.
Most men fear rejection from women. Hassan Kidawa, a student says, ’I won’t make a pass at a woman unless I am very sure she wants me to.’
And even then, I often mess up. Shy men or, rather normal men; rely on various artificial aids to keep their fear at bay.
They drink and/or tell a lot of lies all in the name of hooking up women.
It is, of course, perfectly true to say that even when a woman has said yes to a man the fear doesn’t go away, instead, the man gets more fears.
Human beings have their limitations, and at times when they don’t achieve what they are striving for, they cry.
So disappointments are part of our lives, and we shouldn’t lament when we find ourselves in such situations.
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