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Girls’ plight: What are parents doing?
2006-03-17 09:52:25
By Marycelina Masha
Each morning as I pass through the University of Dar es Salaam on my way to work, I see groups of women balancing buckets of water on their heads. There is nothing unusual in going out to fetch water, given the water blues in the city of Dar es Salaam.
I did it once and believe you me; it made me feel like a village woman of the 1960s, from Pare Mountains. We did not have tap water or electricity those days, but as I said, there is nothing wrong with carrying a bucket of water in Dar es Salaam.
It’s nothing to be ashamed of. After all, water is life.
I’m a little upset however, that even after so much sensitization and activism, our girls are still the beasts of burden.
My attention was drawn to this girl whose face is always present at the water drawing point, situated close to a house belonging to University of Dar es Salaam lecturers.
One fine morning I offered her a lift, which is just one of those small favours you do without even being asked for.
However, the girl politely declined the offer and excused herself, saying that she could not leave her fellows behind.
But I was not to give up until luck came on my way when I spotted her in the company of two of her friends on their way home with their buckets of water one Saturday. This time around they accepted my offer and a conversation between us ensued.
Anita Mshanga ( not her real name) is in Form Two at a private school in Dar es Salaam. She wakes up at 4.00 a.m everyday and has to call up her two neighbours, Philipa and Rose ( both nicknames) so they can rush to fetch water some three kilometers away from home , before leaving for school.
The girls join other women as they have to walk in groups for fear of muggers. The three kilometer stretch is a dangerous spot, Anita tells me and adds that hooligans and pickpockets pester pedestrians, and women most.
Stories abound of university students being assaulted and even raped, while local authorities just watch and shrug it off. This shocked me, but the story is not yet over.
I asked Anita about her daily routine and whether she gets time to rest and do her homework.
Indeed I also needed to know whether she and her fellows had reliable transport to school. I found myself doing an exclusive story.
’No! My parents tell me they can only afford to pay for my school fees but not transport.
So I use public transport which as you see, I have to walk for four kilometers before reaching the bus stop . We have to be in groups. Three of us, at least,’ she says.
Are the local government authorities or the area MP doing anything about it? Are they aware of the transport and water problems facing the people living in this university vicinity?
’Nobody cares. No-one listens to us. All our parents want us to do is do the house chores and go to school. Whether we have transport or easy access to water and other essential requirements or not, is up to us.
Even if I fall sick today, my two brothers wouldn’t go to fetch water. They would wait until I have recovered, ’’said Anita.
Does she get time to study and do home work and assignments?
’I would say hardly. With every one waiting for me to cook ugali in the evening, I can’t get sufficient time to do evening preps.
Worse still, everyone harasses me all the time, saying they are sure I would not make a good wife. It is very frustrating,’ she says.
What does all this mean? Does Anita have any illusions for a better future?
’How can I even think of the future while the present is so bleak? My prayer is to get a caring husband, that’s all,’ she says.
Well then, I would like to believe that Anita was only joking when she resigned her fate to a so-called caring husband. I don’t believe that good husbands exist. Sorry, for women still believing that today’s husbands are prepared to feed and clothe them!
You’ve got to show them you are also good and in most cases, better than them.
Then they will respect you. And don’t even think that being good is enough. Think of being self-reliant. Yes, a woman who is capable of standing on her own earns respects from everyone surrounding her.
Why are women not yet self-reliant?
For the past three years, girls have emerged tops in the national form four examinations.
Frankly, I was hoping to see messages flooding the press, congratulating them for the wonderful performance.
I expected to read the profile of the best performance ….
How she felt when she learnt about the results, her family background, her future plans after school and whether she needed any financial assistance.
But that was not to be. The news of the girls’ victory died away as soon as it was divulged. Why didn’t the girl feature prominently even after proving that the boys had been obviously beaten, were it to be an academic competition ?
Certainly, we have more questions than answers. But one thing is for sure, society still oppresses girls.
Imagine if the girls were given equal opportunity as boys,
What if parents resolved to giving more time and support to their girls, and leave the cooking of ugali to someone else?
As a parent, and one who treasures education for girls, I think the parents have to shoulder the blame for not sacrificing whatever little they have for their daughters’ education.
If they were zealous, the desperation that forces girls to flee their homes and indulge in commercial sex and drugs or getting married as a last resort, would not be a big problem today.
We cannot ignore the plight of girls who fail to get good education. We must be inspired by great women holding influential positions and contribute towards the welfare of the girl-child.
A well educated girl cares for her family most. She is decent and exemplary.
She makes the right decisions and does not succumb to sadistic sexual relationships. She is a responsible person and helps raise the family.
Above all, she is a responsible citizen and that is what the nation, particularly the forth phase government is geared to.
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