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Our children can be our teachers
2006-03-30 07:30:20
By Beatrice P. Mgaya
I must say I learnt one good thing a few days ago. I didn’t know it was important to do things together with one’s children.
It is very important for parents to reduce themselves to the level of their children and play some of the games, which might appear silly to adults.
I went to the park and played soccer with my children, it was tiring but I must admit it was also exciting. My children looked overjoyed, they really enjoyed every minute of it.
A week later, my youngest child started asking, ’’mummy are you going to work this weekend?’’ I asked him why and he went on to say, ’’I wouldn’t mind playing soccer again this Saturday, and this time around you and me will play against dad and brother, don’t you think it will be fun?’’
Now we have to spare time for playing soccer, gymnastics, other games and study together.
We also watch movies together, but of course you have to be selective about the movies you watch with your children.
Sometimes I take them out for a walk and we have time to chat with each other. This just gives me more time with my children and brings us closer together.
I have noticed that involving your children in some of your activities will reduce time spend apart.
If your job requires you to work during weekends or at home sometimes involve your children in doing it if they can help and that will break monotony.
For instance I remember how I used to do the duty roaster for my mother or make the master time table for my father.
At one time my brother and I designed a very beautiful master timetable for our father and everyone at work kept asking him who had done it for him.
That way we were not bored that our parents were bringing work home because they involved us in the work and we started making use of our creative minds much to their delights.
Imagine how we could have felt if they had told us to go and play outside or watch television so that we do not disturb them while they work?
Terrible isn’t it.
They made the best out of the situation in that they managed to have their work done at the same time they developed our creativity and we managed to spend time together because we did it with them.
Our parents also learnt one or two things from us. We were able to use our creativity to make their work look better.
Sometimes you just neglect the talent in your children unknowingly. Involve them and you will see that it pays. They will learn from you and you will also learn from them.
Many times we neglect our children unknowingly. We should try as much as possible to de-role and put ourselves at the same level with our children, that way we will help them develop and grow up to be responsible people.
They need to spend time with their beloved parents, this way you can teach them useful attributes like sharing and mixing with others.
You can also teach them the basics of dealing with failure, they have to know that life is not all about success sometimes. Playing with my children taught me a number of things, at first you will notice that they don’t take failure lightly.
Sometimes they cry, sulk or get angry and violent after losing. It is your duty to teach them that there is no need for all that. Each time a game is played there has to be a winner and a loser and if one is unhappy about losing, one has to work harder next time instead of being violent or withdrawn.
Playing different games with my children made me realise that I can help correct their behaviour that way I will be helping them to grow into responsible and respectable adults.
Some people commit suicide because of failing to achieve what they want in life but if you teach your child that failure is part of life.
That failure can motivate them to work harder next time, it will help them in life. They will never commit suicide or do something stupid because of failure. They will learn that it is important to keep trying.
Don’t be a stranger to your own children.
Instead be their best friend, that way they will be so close to you to the extent that they say everything to you because they are not scared of you. If they say everything to you then you will get the chance to correct what is wrong and encourage what is right.
Play with them and also work with them when they do their home work. Make sure you are interested in everything they do.
If you constantly ask about their day in school and assist them with their home work, they will definitely perform better in school because they know you are concerned.
Be your children’s friend and avoid assigning the housemaid or house boy the task of entertaining your children because he or she will teach them what he or she believes in not what you believe in as a parent.
Once in a while you might assign them, but let it not become a habit.
At the end of the day the responsibility of moulding your child’s behaviour lies with you. You can never be too busy to play with your children.
Of course your job is important but remember you took that job to provide for your children so don’t ignore them.
Everyone needs tender love and care so we have to make sure we give this to our children if we expect them to grow into well balanced individuals.
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